You know, I don't think happiness is about getting everything you want. I think it's about learning to TRUST YOURSELF TO ADJUST YOURSELF when things go bad. It's about becoming a better version of YOU every single day, when something terrific happens and especially when you survive a stressful situation.
As an introverted and anxious person, I frequently get worn down by life's stressors. For a long time I didn't know how to take care of myself. Then stress started to present itself to me in strange ways, usually in the form of a neck strain or sleepless night! I figured out later in life how to take care of myself. Now, as often as I can, I get outside to walk, run, or bike ride. Things never seem as difficult or sad once I've taken in deep breaths of fresh air and natural beauty. It makes me feel empowered. I can't control the world I live in, but I can control how I choose to react to it. That makes me feel strong, which makes me feel proud, which makes me feel happy!
Children are faced with daily stressors, too. It's our job as parents to relieve their stress, right? Wrong. It's our job to teach them how to TRUST AND ADJUST... how to deal.
It's difficult to see our children unhappy. We want to fix their problems for them. While our hearts are in the right place, swooping in to fix everything can be detrimental. Instead, help them understand their temperament- are they introverted or extroverted? Knowing is powerful, because introverts and extroverts gain emotional energy in very different ways. Be a safe place for them to vent. Ask open-ended questions to guide their thinking toward recovery. Help them find activities that calm them. They need to learn to trust that THEY have what it takes to adjust their thinking and move through unfortunate situations. Nurture self-control and resilience! That's where happiness lives!